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Finding reliable partners requires considering their experience, self-awareness, execution ability, organizational building, and fact-driven approach, while also focusing on their goals, idols, interests, and integrity during interviews.

A simple way to make things easier is to have people remember you, help you, and communicate with you by establishing a strong projection model and clear requirements, and by making motions before meetings, which can help you find interesting partners.

Thinking about ideas that seem strange or bad is valuable because they may occasionally be correct and can help us break free from traditional thinking constraints.

The first is having made a lot of money: earning a million in a business in a year ensures that the mindset won't be swayed when making more money.

The second is having endured great hardships: having experienced failure gives courage to persist when facing difficulties again.

The third is education: having the ability to learn, a shared understanding in communication, and knowing what one is expressing.

The fourth is having a background: being able to leverage family resources, whether from a government or business background, preferably having a family that has run a hotel.

Four stages worth noting in interpersonal relationships:

● Initial acquaintance (hang out)

● Some affection (seeing each other)

● Eager to meet regularly (dating)

● Confirming the relationship (relationship)

Regarding long-term investment, here are four points to know:

First, identify whether your project has very strong characteristics of long-term investment.

Some projects/industries require a long time, persistence, and a certain degree of stability due to their inherent characteristics. For such projects, hasty changes are often disastrous; sometimes a single change can turn the project's value negative.

Second, before a certain milestone in the project, adopt a low-cost operation approach.

We may see many companies starting with high investments, but even these companies have had phases of low-cost operations. Many startups fail because they expand recklessly before planning their future after not having gone through a low-cost operation phase, resulting in more mistakes as they do more. By the time they realize, valuable resources (mainly funds) have already been exhausted.

Third, look inward; long-term investment is about concentrating resources at a critical place that requires cumulative effects.

For example, for an internet application, it may be the core algorithm and engine; for a consulting firm, it may be key talents and databases.

Fourth, look outward; long-term investment is about identifying things that remain unchanged for customers (clients) or things that appear unchanged to outsiders. A startup will undergo countless changes, but these can only be internal changes. After determining the interface with customers, any changes to the interface must be approached with extreme caution.

"Musicians compose, painters paint, poets write poetry, only then can they feel justified." — Maslow

That is, each person's belief system for judging right and wrong guides us in pursuing what we want. All our actions are aimed at realizing our values; otherwise, life feels incomplete and meaningless. Values dominate our way of life and influence our reactions to everything around us. Values are akin to a computer's operating system; although you can input any data, whether the computer accepts or processes it depends on whether the operating system has set the relevant programs. Values are the system in our minds that determines whether to execute.

From the clothes you wear, the car you drive, the house you live in, to the way you raise your children, everything is influenced by values. They are the norms by which we conduct ourselves and the key to unleashing the magical power within us; we rely on them to understand and judge our own and others' behaviors.

How are values formed? They are special, emotional, stemming from your beliefs, and influenced by the environment. When you were a child, your parents helped cultivate your values. They repeatedly told you what you should or shouldn't do, what you should or shouldn't watch, and what you should or shouldn't believe based on their values. If you followed their words, you would receive praise; if you didn't, you would be reprimanded or even punished.

In fact, the values you formed as a child were mostly shaped through rewards and punishments. As you grew older, your peers became another source of values, possessing values different from yours. You might integrate both sets of values or change your own because if you don't, other children won't play with you, or they might even beat you up.

Throughout your life, as you continually make new friends, you influence each other's values and even adopt new ones. You may also have a hero-worship mentality, mimicking their words and actions. Many older children become addicted to drugs due to their admiration for certain pop stars, aligning themselves with those stars' drug habits. Fortunately, many of the heroes they admire today understand their significant responsibility as public figures in shaping societal values and thus refuse to use and discourage others from using drugs. Many artists are aware that their media presence plays a crucial role in influencing societal values.

For example, Geldof united many singers to launch the "Live Aid" campaign to save African famine victims, holding multiple concerts. Their efforts and leadership strengthened people's concern for social values.

The formation of personal values is not necessarily influenced by celebrities; in the workplace, the system of rewards and punishments can also change a person's values. For instance, if you have long served a company or often work under someone, your values will be influenced. If your values differ from your boss's, promotion will be difficult.

If you don't align with the company's values (corporate culture), work can be very painful. Teachers in schools often influence students' values due to differing standards of rewards and punishments.

When our goals or self-identification change, values can also change. For example, if you are determined to climb to a high position in the company, your work attitude will change; once you occupy that position, your views on many company matters will differ from before. Your values will change according to your goals and identity. At this time, the car you drive, the places you go, the friends you make, and the things you do will all reflect your self-identification.

People's values regarding the same matter can differ.

For example, a big boss driving a small car is not necessarily because he wants to save fuel, but simply because he doesn't want to be like everyone else; a wealthy person living in a modest house instead of a luxurious villa does not indicate stinginess but rather a desire not to waste space. Thus, values often stem from different perspectives on how to measure things.

Understanding your own values is crucial; however, most people are not very clear about them, often unaware of the purpose behind their actions. If two people's values differ too greatly, it can easily lead to friction and suspicion, causing conflict. This phenomenon occurs not only between individuals but also between nations.

There are value differences between nations and individuals, and even within a single person, there can be discrepancies in values, meaning that certain traits may be prioritized over others.

For some, honesty is a second life; for others, friendship outweighs everything. Such values may lead the latter to lie for the sake of loyalty. They do this because, in their value hierarchy, the importance of friendship surpasses that of honesty. Perhaps in your value hierarchy, career and family are equally important, but when you promise your child you'll be home for dinner that night only to find out before leaving work that you have a social engagement, whether you go to that engagement depends on how you prioritize career or family. At that moment, you find yourself in a dilemma, unable to have both. If you've had such experiences, you can understand the motivations behind your own and others' actions stem from the order of value hierarchy.

To understand a person, you must know their value hierarchy; otherwise, you cannot grasp their motivations. Similarly, if you can understand your own value hierarchy, you will avoid internal unrest or conflict in your dealings with others. Any success that does not align with your fundamental values cannot be lasting.

For instance, someone may earn a high salary but feel uneasy because they know the money comes from dubious sources; in such a case, don't expect them to work diligently. Likewise, if a person places great importance on family reunions, they won't be happy if their job requires frequent overtime, as the work situation conflicts with their values. Our actions must align with our values; otherwise, even if we possess great wealth, we won't feel happy.

I don't wish to discuss the right or wrong of values, but I hope you understand that your values must help, inspire, and guide you. Values are a collective term for how you subjectively rank all external matters, both tangible and intangible, in your mind.

However, most people are unaware of the order of their values (value hierarchy), and even if they are, it's often quite vague. I must tell you that being able to distinguish these value hierarchies is extremely important; it determines whether you will experience internal conflict in your dealings with others and whether your help to others will be appreciated. The first step in understanding value hierarchy is to see what value items it includes.

How can you identify your own or others' value hierarchies? Typically, we have different value hierarchies in work, family, and friendships. To find out someone else's value hierarchy in friendships, you might ask, "What do you think is most important in friendship?" They might say, "They need to be able to help at any time." You then ask, "Why is being able to help at any time important?" They might respond, "So they can show they care about me."

"Why is expressing their care important?" "Because that makes me happy." By continuing to ask questions like this, you will eventually create a list of value hierarchy items.

Next, you need to compare to determine the order of these value items. You could ask, "Between the other person's help and your feeling of happiness, which do you think is more important?" If the answer is, "The feeling of happiness," then it indicates that it ranks higher in this hierarchy.

Then you could ask, "Between the feeling of being cared for and the feeling of happiness, which do you think is more important?" If they answer, "The feeling of happiness," then it's clear that happiness is the most important of the three value items. Now you can ask, "Between being cared for and receiving help, which do you think is more important?"

If they respond, "Being cared for is more important," you can deduce that care ranks second, below happiness but above help. By comparing item by item, you can understand the relative order of the other person's value items. In the previous example, even if the other person doesn't mind not receiving help from friends, if another person places help above care, they might feel uncared for if they don't receive help, potentially leading to a breakup.

Below, I list 14 value items related to friendship for your reference, though there may be others. If you have additional items, feel free to add them.

Care (Love) Happiness (Ecstasy) Communication (Mutual communication) Respect

Fun (Fun) Growth (Growth) Help (Support) Challenge (Challenge)

Creativity (Creativity) Beauty (Beauty) Affection (Attraction) Spiritual unity (Spiritual unity)

Freedom (Freedom) Honesty (Honesty)

Now you can rank them according to their importance in your mind. Ranking is a difficult and complex task; you need to compare them one by one as mentioned earlier to establish the correct value hierarchy.

Once you have completed the value hierarchy for friendships, you can also conduct a value hierarchy for work. For example, you might ask yourself, "What do I think is most important in work?" You might say creativity. Then you ask, "Why is creativity important?" "Because I feel growth when I am creative." "Why is growth important?" By continuing this line of questioning, you can list the value hierarchy items. If you are a parent, you can use this method with your children to identify the value items that inspire them.

By establishing value hierarchies, you can uncover many life aspects, often surprising yourself by ranking certain value items higher than expected. By focusing on your value hierarchy, you can understand the motivations behind certain actions.

Knowing your most important value items is crucial, as it allows you to concentrate your efforts on what you pursue.

1. The usefulness of things,
2. The direction of desires,
3. The satisfaction of desires by things.

Simply organizing your value hierarchy is not enough because when people discuss value items, although they may use the same words, it doesn't mean they have the same meaning. If you truly care about each other's value hierarchies, you need to put in the effort to clarify the true meaning of those words.

Take the value item "care" for example; you might ask, "What must happen for you to feel cared for?" "What makes you care about that person?" "How do you know when others don't care about you?" Asking questions like this can lead to the most precise definition of "care." This process is not easy, but if you put in the effort, you will gain more self-awareness and understand your true desires; when your wishes are fulfilled, you will know for certain.

Of course, you cannot determine the value hierarchy for every friend, but for those with whom you have a close relationship, such as a partner or child, you should know their thoughts. For others around you, it is not necessary to go so in-depth; just pay attention to certain key points. When interacting with others, both parties likely have expectations of each other and judge each other's character based on actions and words. If you can understand the other person's values, it becomes easier to reach a consensus, and you can anticipate their behavior and true needs.

In everyday conversations, if you can listen carefully to the words others use and observe which words they repeat, you can easily identify the value items they prioritize, allowing you to provide appropriate encouragement and motivation in those areas in the future.

Understanding employees' value items is an issue that business leaders cannot overlook. Every employee has a highest expectation (value item) regarding their work; for some, it may be money, for others, creativity, challenge, or stability. If a company can meet these expectations, employees will stay long-term; otherwise, they will leave.

For managers, knowing employees' value hierarchies in their work is absolutely necessary. Initially, you should ask, "What are your main criteria for choosing a company?" Suppose the employee responds, "A creative environment." You would then continue to ask questions based on this item to uncover their value hierarchy. Next, change the direction of your questioning and ask what their main value item would be if the aforementioned value items were all present.

If they say, "Lack of trust," you would follow up with, "Even if there is a lack of trust, what could keep you here?" Some might say they would never consider staying, indicating that "trust" is the most important value item for those individuals. Others might say that as long as there are opportunities for promotion, they would stay, prompting you to continue asking until you uncover their non-negotiable value items. These most important value items act like super anchors, strongly influencing the emotions of the individuals involved. Additionally, you must pay special attention to clearly defining these value items. For example, "trust" in one person's mind may mean not doubting their decisions, while "lack of trust" in another's mind may mean being reassigned without any explanation. Only by clearly understanding these value items can managers anticipate how to handle employee issues in various situations.

Some managers believe that as long as they provide employees with satisfactory salaries, employees will work hard. While this view is not entirely incorrect, different individuals prioritize different value items. Some may find it most important to work with people they like; when those people leave, they lose interest in their work. For others, a good job is one that allows them to express creativity and face challenges. If managers want to excel in their roles, they must understand employees' work values and meet them; if they cannot provide this satisfaction, they risk losing employees, and even if they don't lose them, those employees may not work hard.

Is it time-consuming and requires keen observation to understand employees' work values? Certainly, but the effort is worthwhile. Values have a significant impact on personal emotions; if you only approach things from your perspective, you may face resistance and rejection from employees. Conversely, if you can bridge the gap between your work values and theirs, you can enjoy pleasant interactions with employees. In our lives, whether our values align with others is not crucial; what matters is whether we can respect others' values and meet their needs.

The role of values shares the same characteristics as other concepts discussed in this book. Remember what we said earlier: we are always using a map, one that does not accurately display the real boundaries. If the map you use is similar to mine, communication between us will be easy. If we consider values as a map, it may be the most important and detailed map. Therefore, when I talk to you about values, you are essentially comparing your map with mine to see if they align; you might discover that there is not a single similarity. If you and I both regard "freedom" as the most important value item, then we may find common ground and agreement.

However, it's not that simple because my concept of freedom may refer to the freedom to do as I please, while your concept of freedom might mean being free from disturbance. For others, freedom might refer to what is politically defined.

"If life has nothing worth sacrificing for, it is as if one has lived in vain." — Martin Luther King Jr.

Because values have a primary characteristic, they exert an extraordinary influence on people's emotions, uniting people in ways that nothing else can. History is replete with examples of the few overcoming the many, all thanks to values. If values can wield such power, if we can truly identify the value hierarchies of those related to us, we can accomplish things we previously thought impossible.

Shared values form the basis for consensus. If two people's values are completely aligned, their relationship can endure; if their values are entirely different, not only will the relationship not last long, but it may not even exist. However, no relationship falls into either extreme, so there are still two things you can do.

First, identify commonalities in both value systems and use them to help resolve differences. (Isn't this what Reagan and Gorbachev worked hard to achieve in high-level meetings? Finding common interests between the two countries to maintain their relationship—such as avoiding nuclear destruction.)

Second, do your utmost to help the other person achieve their greatest desires. If you can accomplish these two things, you can establish mutually supportive and lasting relationships in your life and work.

Values are a crucial factor in determining whether a person is hypocritical or can be inspired. If you can understand the other person's values, you can grasp the direction of all their behaviors. Values are the ultimate arbiters, deciding what should be done and what should not.

Values hold different meanings for everyone, and the measures taken to realize them also vary. When setting your pursuit goals, you should also establish a verification process to help you determine whether you are on the right path and whether you are truly reaching your destination. This verification process is not fixed; you have the authority to change it as long as it helps you move forward, and you can adjust it from time to time.

Sometimes values can change rapidly without us realizing it, rendering our established verification processes either inappropriate or outdated. Many of us focus solely on our goals, fixating on what represents the utmost value in our minds, only to realize that achieving that goal holds no meaning for us. The reason lies in the fact that our values have changed long ago, but our verification processes have not adapted accordingly.

At times, people have verification processes that do not align with their values, so even though they know the goals they are pursuing, they lack clarity on their motivations. Thus, when they achieve those goals, they find it was merely an illusion, a result of going with the flow. I want to remind you to regularly pay attention to changes in your values and continuously reflect on whether those values can help you lead a happy and fulfilling life.

Here, I want to emphasize the importance of flexibility. We mentioned earlier that only the most flexible systems have the greatest choices and are the most effective. Without flexibility, you may exclude many people and things that could help you achieve your goals, leading to inevitable failure.

To understand and inspire yourself and others, the most effective method is to combine values with personality patterns.

Values determine our thoughts and perspectives, while personality patterns influence our cognition and actions. If you can align these two functions effectively, you can develop the most inspiring patterns.

I once mentored a wayward young man who had nearly driven his parents to despair. His parents were most dissatisfied with his lack of consideration for the consequences of his actions. In my conversations with this young man, I discovered that his personality pattern combined pursuit and need types. I then asked him to rank his top three values: security, happiness, and trust.

After gathering this information, I proceeded to model my approach to achieve alignment. I explained to him that his behavior—wandering outside for two days without seeking his parents' consent or maintaining contact—was jeopardizing his value items.

If he continued in this manner, his parents would lose patience and send him to a place devoid of security, happiness, and trust, which could be a prison or a reform school. Since his parents could not manage him, they would let him stay in a place that could.

My words provided him with things he would want to avoid, which would jeopardize his value items. (For many, even if they are pursuit types, they will still avoid behaviors detrimental to them.) I then told him how to win back his parents' trust so they would continue to provide him with a home that offered security, happiness, and trust.

First, he must return home by 10 PM every night; second, he must find a job within a week; third, he must help with household chores. I told him that if he could genuinely follow these three points within 60 days, his parents would increase their trust in him and provide him with the protection and happiness he deserved.

I made it clear to him that these rules were things he "must do" immediately (targeting his "need" and "pursuit" personality patterns) to maintain what he considered important, and those three must-follow rules served as verification processes. In the past, he didn't know what actions would earn his parents' support, but after combining value items with personality patterns, he transformed into the good child in his parents' eyes.

When a person has clear values, they can unleash explosive power. In the past, your values were governed by the subconscious; now you have the ability to understand them and direct them positively.

One important point for each of us is that values can change, and people can change; the only ones who do not change are those buried underground.

Each of us must follow the trends of the times, grasp the pulse of society, and keep moving forward. If one stubbornly clings to their own views without embracing the changes of the times, it will be difficult to establish oneself in the world.

Finally, I must ask you to pay attention: we are constantly imitating others, and our children, subordinates, and colleagues also imitate us from various angles. If we want to be worthy of their imitation, we must possess strong and powerful values and consistent behavior.

While imitating others' actions is important, emulating their values is even more crucial. Learn from those great individuals, from those who have succeeded, and adopt the value items that enrich life, guiding you toward success.

The so-called "Master System":

The "Master System" is the key factor that influences your entire life.

All human behavior is controlled by the "Master System," just as physics or chemistry is governed by certain laws or principles. This "Master System" consists of five main parts.

Each person's interpretation or reaction to everything around them is governed by these five parts.

How the Master System manipulates the formation of thoughts:

1. The current "psychological state" and "emotions."

2. The types of questions one asks oneself.

The type of questions determines the type of thoughts produced.

3. Our "values."

There are two types of values:

1. One is called "pursuit values," such as love, growth, joy, and a sense of achievement, which are the pleasant emotions we continuously seek.

2. The other is called "avoidance values," such as frustration, depression, anger, and humiliation, which are the painful emotions we strive to avoid.

3. Our "beliefs."

These can be divided into two levels.

1. The "higher level" is what we generally refer to as "beliefs," which gives us a sense of control over our feelings, ourselves, life, and the people around us.

2. The "lower level" is what we call "conditions," which are the prerequisites we believe must be met to pursue certain values.

The so-called "evaluation"

The thoughts jointly determined by the "Master System" are referred to as "evaluations." "Beliefs and conditions" generate "evaluations."

Successful individuals share a common trait: they maintain a positive evaluation of everything happening around them.

5. Our "mental frameworks."

These are the rich knowledge and experiences stored in our minds that we can reference when making decisions; I refer to this as "mental frameworks."

Mental frameworks generate "beliefs and conditions."

Every day, we must seize opportunities to learn new mental frameworks to enhance positive beliefs, establish useful values, and ask new questions, positioning ourselves to fully move toward our goals and achieve the life we desire.

Need for feedback mechanisms

There are roughly three aspects: identifying problems, correcting the course, and adjusting the mindset.

1. Identifying problems. As the saying goes, "Being in the situation makes it hard to see the situation"; it's often difficult for us to recognize our own problems, while others, as observers, can notice what we cannot. In the workplace, we frequently receive feedback from colleagues or supervisors; sometimes, improving our work may just require a small adjustment. In life, if a benefactor offers guidance, sometimes just a few words can provide profound insights.

2. Correcting the course. The path of life is long; sometimes we forget why we started, and at other times we may get lost in the details. At such times, feedback is needed to pull us out of the minutiae and reassess the larger direction, which is difficult to achieve without others' assistance.

3. Adjusting the mindset. Positive feedback can help us build confidence, while negative feedback can help us avoid blind confidence. During tough times, we need encouragement, and during good times, we need reminders. Relying solely on oneself to adjust one's mindset can sometimes lead to bias, and everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, as well as situations that are beneficial or detrimental to them. When caught in negative emotions, one tends to focus only on their shortcomings and disadvantages, making external feedback mechanisms essential.

However, feedback cannot be accepted unconditionally; one must still exercise personal judgment. Another unfortunate point is that the feedback that truly promotes growth is often unpalatable, and accepting it requires a strong mindset.

How to establish it?

Actually, I am still exploring this, but it revolves around being proactive.

Interpersonal connections

First is connecting with people. Finding a mentor is the easiest way, but finding a good mentor is quite challenging. While there are many talented individuals, true mentors are rare. This mentor must have sufficient experience, such as having navigated all the detours you are currently facing; they must also understand your actual situation, which can be compensated for later through more communication; finally, they must be willing to invest time and energy to help you.

My ideal mentor is someone like this: they are the person I aspire to become, and their help feels like they are assisting their younger self; sometimes, they don't even need to say anything—just their presence allows me to feel their strength.

Difficult as it may be, it is still possible to find one, and I increasingly feel that having a life mentor is particularly important.

Social media

Next is social media; I believe many people underestimate the power of social platforms, possibly because they haven't found the right way to use them. I think the greatest value of social platforms is connection; people who would normally require "six degrees of separation" to connect can now communicate directly.

My own experience is:

1. Share your current situation more; if you want feedback from others, you need to open up first.

2. Pay more attention to the posts of people you admire.

3. If you have questions, message them directly; don't be afraid to disturb others, but be polite. If they don't respond, don't overthink it; they may have simply forgotten or not have time to reply—move on and go next.

In summary, be a genuine person; what everyone wants to see is a real person, not an overly packaged marketing persona. Only sincere people can elicit sincere feedback.

Journals and books

I used to struggle to understand why older individuals are so obsessed with metaphysical topics until I grew older and realized that sometimes one must "look inward." When the external world cannot change, one can only adjust their mindset. If external feedback is elusive, one can only seek it from journals and books. Journals are a dialogue with oneself; I truly admire Zeng Guofan for writing self-reflective journals throughout his life. Books are a dialogue with the author; sometimes, one doesn't need to finish a book; just a sentence or two can provide clarity.

However, it is best to have an external feedback mechanism, as one will always have filters when looking at oneself.

Long-term

Finally, the most crucial point is that feedback mechanisms are not a one-time effort but a continuous process. Establishing a long-term feedback loop is essential to ensure ongoing improvement.

Here, improvement primarily refers to decision-making, as too many variables are uncontrollable. Only by continually adjusting our decisions can we cope with various uncertainties.

Both the larger direction and smaller events require constant adjustments; optimizing our decisions through feedback mechanisms is the core of this discussion, and I hope it provides you with some small help.

A wealth lifecycle. In simple terms, there are four stages:

1. Creation of economic value

2. Capture/control of that value

3. How much leverage is being applied

4. Period of time during which the capital compounds